NEVER MAKE EYE CONTACT WHILE EATING A BANANA!

For THE DIET ISSUE our stylist Kathi Kauder transformed the shape of banana stickers to fashionable accessories. Additionally, Gintare Parulyte told her story of a very unique kind of banana shock.

Read the entire story and find the beauty photo series after the jump.

Generally speaking, the main purpose of consuming food consists of overcoming

the uncomfortable and distracting sensation of hunger, calming hormonal cravings

for chocolate, and curing hangovers with a serious intake of junk. Yet one shouldn’t

forget the possibility of some types of food used as pleasure enhancers in the sex

department. During my first appointment at my gynecologist, at the innocent age of

13, she urged me to beware the dangers of bananas.

It turned out that a girl my age had read an article in a sex education column that

mentioned a series of foods one could use to obtain orgasms including, of course,

the multiple uses of bananas. Used to consuming bananas in their peeled from, the

girl peeled her purchased green banana, hoping that it being unripe would prevent

it from breaking, and began her mission under her warm and naive teenage bed

sheets. The entry of this exotic fruit into her innocent yet curious vagina was smooth

and felt good. 

Yet once she attempted to give it a series of a pleasure-inducing

movements, she was forced to notice that the movement inside her greedy vagina

didn’t correspond with the exterior movement she made on the trunk. Yes, the

banana broke. She ran to the bathroom, lay on the cold tiles in front of the vertical

bathroom mirror and tried to spread her skinny legs as much as she could. Spreading

her legs was not something she had trained up to then. She inserted her fingers

into her genitals and tried to empty the tunnel. To her surprise and relief, she soon

felt the mission accomplished. However, the following days revealed a constantly

stronger odour of riper and riper banana coming from down under. One day the aroma

was so ripe, making her shame and panic so great, that she audaciously called

her gynecologist, begging to save her without judgment. After thanking the doctor

for elegantly cleaning her mess, she asked her to prevent more girls from possible

banana shocks by spreading her story as anonymously as possible, which she did,

amongst others, to the young me. Thank you, dear banana girl, for sharing your story,

although indirectly. I am sure you saved many vaginas from ripe disasters.

TEXT by Gintare Parulyte PHOTOS : Sabrina TheissenFASHION AND ARTWORK: Kathi KauderHAIR & MAKE-UP: Stelli /Tom Ford CosmeticsMODEL: Clara @ elite model management LondonPHOTO ASSISTANT: Fredrik AltinellFASHION ASSISTANT: Julia Heifer